Not much happened today. It snowed a lot. I made pancakes. It snowed a lot outside. I started the rewrite attempt of Found.
Yawn.
See you tomorrow.
Friday, January 7, 2011
Thursday, January 6, 2011
When It Rains...Oh, Did I Mention It's Snowing Again?
So...remember last night's entry, how I said Ryan was feeling much better?
....yyyeahhh. 'Bout that.
He woke up this morning and couldn't open his right eye. When he finally could pry it open, it was blood shot and...gooey. It took all of 30 seconds to convince him that he was going to the clinic.
After all of 30 minutes of filling out paperwork and waiting and seeing the doctor, he had not one, not two, but THREE diagnoses! Conjunctivitis (pink eye) (duh), bronchitis, and an upper respiratory infection!
Went straight to Ryan's Target (right around the corner) so he could talk to someone about his shift tonight. His first-level boss wasn't in, but the next one up was, and she happens to be the same person who gave me her business card when Ryan went to the hospital, asking that I call and let her know that he was okay. She gave him his next two days off (today and Saturday), and renewed Ryan's feelings of job security after having essentially a week's "vacation" from combined days off and calling in sick.
Went to the pharmacy, picked up antibiotics, came home, found out that Sameh--who was already showing symptoms of the same cold--also has pink eye. She just left for the clinic herself, to find out what she already knows and get her own pretty package of antibiotics.
The current household theory is that Horace has been the carrier, as Ryan and Sameh are the two that cuddle him the most...that is, at all. Most of my contact with him is kicking him out of the room after he keeps insisting on attacking the bedding or climbing on our computer towers >.<
ANYWAY. Diagnoses, antibiotics, more time off from work, two days off for the caretaker-girlfriend, and pizza for basically all meals*...it's been a long day for Ryan.
*I was craving the English muffins I bought recently, he was craving pizza, so I made tiny pizzas with the muffins, marinara, mozzarella, a sprinkling of oregano, and, for mine, two sliced olives. Very easy, extremely tasty, I am pretty proud of myself right now.
Edited to add a note to my parents: I am still taking in loads of fluids, vitamin C, and echniacea myself, as well as washing and sanitizing my hands almost constantly. Even considering all that, however, it's still pretty amazing that I haven't gotten sick. Woo!
....yyyeahhh. 'Bout that.
He woke up this morning and couldn't open his right eye. When he finally could pry it open, it was blood shot and...gooey. It took all of 30 seconds to convince him that he was going to the clinic.
After all of 30 minutes of filling out paperwork and waiting and seeing the doctor, he had not one, not two, but THREE diagnoses! Conjunctivitis (pink eye) (duh), bronchitis, and an upper respiratory infection!
Went straight to Ryan's Target (right around the corner) so he could talk to someone about his shift tonight. His first-level boss wasn't in, but the next one up was, and she happens to be the same person who gave me her business card when Ryan went to the hospital, asking that I call and let her know that he was okay. She gave him his next two days off (today and Saturday), and renewed Ryan's feelings of job security after having essentially a week's "vacation" from combined days off and calling in sick.
Went to the pharmacy, picked up antibiotics, came home, found out that Sameh--who was already showing symptoms of the same cold--also has pink eye. She just left for the clinic herself, to find out what she already knows and get her own pretty package of antibiotics.
The current household theory is that Horace has been the carrier, as Ryan and Sameh are the two that cuddle him the most...that is, at all. Most of my contact with him is kicking him out of the room after he keeps insisting on attacking the bedding or climbing on our computer towers >.<
ANYWAY. Diagnoses, antibiotics, more time off from work, two days off for the caretaker-girlfriend, and pizza for basically all meals*...it's been a long day for Ryan.
*I was craving the English muffins I bought recently, he was craving pizza, so I made tiny pizzas with the muffins, marinara, mozzarella, a sprinkling of oregano, and, for mine, two sliced olives. Very easy, extremely tasty, I am pretty proud of myself right now.
Edited to add a note to my parents: I am still taking in loads of fluids, vitamin C, and echniacea myself, as well as washing and sanitizing my hands almost constantly. Even considering all that, however, it's still pretty amazing that I haven't gotten sick. Woo!
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Rage! Rage! ....Rage?
So...tired...
Woke up at 9 today, enough time to decide if Ryan needed to go to the doctor, and if I needed to call out to get him there. He decided that, if I could find someone to take my shift, he'd like to have me drive him to the clinic. His throat was still extremely sore, and he had a lot of pressure in his head.
Called/texted three people. Two were busy, one slept through all three of my calls. >.<
Ryan said it was fine, and refused to let me just call out and have the store deal with it. I'm not sure I would have been okay with doing that as it is...point is, I went in. I was exhausted and cranky beyond belief, but I went in.
I arrived, warned everyone I was cranky, and prepared myself to be a bitch for the entire day. Not on purpose, just...not trying to put on a fake smile and lie through clenched teeth. Instead, I was nicer and sweeter and more cheerful and charitable than usual.
...confuuuuuused.
BUT. Tomorrow and Friday are my days off! And Ryan is feeling much, MUCH better! He even plans on going to work tomorrow! Huzzah!
I may get real sleep for the time in 2011! WOO!
Woke up at 9 today, enough time to decide if Ryan needed to go to the doctor, and if I needed to call out to get him there. He decided that, if I could find someone to take my shift, he'd like to have me drive him to the clinic. His throat was still extremely sore, and he had a lot of pressure in his head.
Called/texted three people. Two were busy, one slept through all three of my calls. >.<
Ryan said it was fine, and refused to let me just call out and have the store deal with it. I'm not sure I would have been okay with doing that as it is...point is, I went in. I was exhausted and cranky beyond belief, but I went in.
I arrived, warned everyone I was cranky, and prepared myself to be a bitch for the entire day. Not on purpose, just...not trying to put on a fake smile and lie through clenched teeth. Instead, I was nicer and sweeter and more cheerful and charitable than usual.
...confuuuuuused.
BUT. Tomorrow and Friday are my days off! And Ryan is feeling much, MUCH better! He even plans on going to work tomorrow! Huzzah!
I may get real sleep for the time in 2011! WOO!
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Just Keep Swimmin', Just Keep Swimmin'...
I am currently even more tired than I was yesterday. I think I might have gotten a bit more sleep...but not by too much. Ryan's fever broke around 5:30, which was of course a good thing. The fact that it woke both of us up was not. Neither of us really got any real sleep last night. Like...at all.
But his fever broke! This is a good thing!
The plan for tomorrow is, if his throat is still really sore, he's going to go to the doctor, with or without my help. Tomorrow would be five straight day of a painfully sore throat, which is just too damned long. He seems much better tonight, though, so...yay.
I was dumb and cranky and pretty much useless for the whopping five hours I worked. Tomorrow is a full eight hour shift, starting at 10:30 in the morning. I'm waking up at 9 to see if Ryan needs me to call out to drive him to the doctor. Obviously, the hope is no.
The hope is also that I don't catch this head cold. It's looking good--I've been drinking a lot of liquids, eating lots of protein, taking lots of vitamin C and echinacea, etc etc. My biggest "symptom" is exhaustion, but that's not necessarily from any illness.
Everything else over the past few days has gone by the wayside. Chores of all kinds have taken the back burner to taking care of Ryan and myself and going to work--dishes, house cleaning, recycling, even my daily photography. I owe my Tumblr many pictures now. I hate it, but I'm just too tired, and there's more important things to worry about.
One more day, then two days off. I can make it. Wish us luck and health!
But his fever broke! This is a good thing!
The plan for tomorrow is, if his throat is still really sore, he's going to go to the doctor, with or without my help. Tomorrow would be five straight day of a painfully sore throat, which is just too damned long. He seems much better tonight, though, so...yay.
I was dumb and cranky and pretty much useless for the whopping five hours I worked. Tomorrow is a full eight hour shift, starting at 10:30 in the morning. I'm waking up at 9 to see if Ryan needs me to call out to drive him to the doctor. Obviously, the hope is no.
The hope is also that I don't catch this head cold. It's looking good--I've been drinking a lot of liquids, eating lots of protein, taking lots of vitamin C and echinacea, etc etc. My biggest "symptom" is exhaustion, but that's not necessarily from any illness.
Everything else over the past few days has gone by the wayside. Chores of all kinds have taken the back burner to taking care of Ryan and myself and going to work--dishes, house cleaning, recycling, even my daily photography. I owe my Tumblr many pictures now. I hate it, but I'm just too tired, and there's more important things to worry about.
One more day, then two days off. I can make it. Wish us luck and health!
Monday, January 3, 2011
The Day Might Have Won Today...
Blargh.
Went to sleep around...12:30? We both tossed and turned, Ryan fought a cough and a fever, and I did my usual am-I-asleep-or-awake routine. Woke up at 7:30 to call him in sick (his throat hurt too much to do so), didn't fall back asleep until around 9. Alarm went off at 10, got up and went to CVS to get a thermometer, cough drops, six bottles of Gatorade, and a bottle each of Echinacea and vitamin C (the latter two were mostly for me, I'll be honest).
Went to work at noon. Worked until six. Had to work with a person who drives me up the wall, felt run down and cranky and dumb from the lack of sleep, somehow managed to not mess up any drinks or kill any customers.
Came home, took Ryan out to get dinner, came home and ate and opened the package of Christmas presents from David & Dorita (thanks, you guys! I promise to call and thank you for real when I'm more alive!!). We're both now tapping idly at the computers, and I'm wondering how much longer I'm going to make it.
I don't feel sick, exactly, just...exhausted. I got maybe three hours in a row last night, and I really have no idea if that's a solid number or not. Combined with tomorrow's 10:30 shift, it's probably going to be a very early night tonight.
If you could send us thoughts of good health it would be most appreciated....*zzzzzz*
Went to sleep around...12:30? We both tossed and turned, Ryan fought a cough and a fever, and I did my usual am-I-asleep-or-awake routine. Woke up at 7:30 to call him in sick (his throat hurt too much to do so), didn't fall back asleep until around 9. Alarm went off at 10, got up and went to CVS to get a thermometer, cough drops, six bottles of Gatorade, and a bottle each of Echinacea and vitamin C (the latter two were mostly for me, I'll be honest).
Went to work at noon. Worked until six. Had to work with a person who drives me up the wall, felt run down and cranky and dumb from the lack of sleep, somehow managed to not mess up any drinks or kill any customers.
Came home, took Ryan out to get dinner, came home and ate and opened the package of Christmas presents from David & Dorita (thanks, you guys! I promise to call and thank you for real when I'm more alive!!). We're both now tapping idly at the computers, and I'm wondering how much longer I'm going to make it.
I don't feel sick, exactly, just...exhausted. I got maybe three hours in a row last night, and I really have no idea if that's a solid number or not. Combined with tomorrow's 10:30 shift, it's probably going to be a very early night tonight.
If you could send us thoughts of good health it would be most appreciated....*zzzzzz*
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Poop.
After spending a good portion of last evening and most of day trying to find anybody to cover my shift, I must haul my butt to work in just a few minutes. I spent most of yesterday taking care of Ryan as a cold set in, and I am a combination of tired, sniffly, and headachy...not to mention I'd feel better if I could take care of Ryan instead of cleaning things at work. Oh well. Such is life.
Picture for the day: Ryan has an idea.
Picture for the day: Ryan has an idea.
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Wish Me Luck.
Thinking about what I wanted to change in/for 2011, I thought of a lot of things: eating habits, exercise habits, daily habits, writing habits, etc. The usual New Years Resolutions stuff.
The one thing that kept popping up, however, was Honesty.
I want to be a more honest person. I'm not exactly a dishonest person now, I don't lie or cheat or steal. I do, however, partake in some gossip (something I'm not proud of), and I keep things to myself that hide the whole picture of how I feel about a person or a situation, the whole picture of who I am. I've been thinking on how I'd like to change these, and other, things.
Then, as always, Free Will Astrology decided to play with my head.
Can you finally escape the pain you got imprinted with during adolescence? Is it a realistic possibility that you could triumph over the conditioning you absorbed before you knew how to talk? Do you have the power to do what few of us have done, which is to get out from under the weight of the past, shed the inertia of your memories, and live brave and free in the raw truth of NOW? If there will ever in your life be a time when you can accomplish at least some of this noble quest, Gemini, it will be in 2011.
The raw truth of Now. That is exactly what I want, and what I need.
I'm going to spend the next month concentrating on purging myself of the Bad and Not Good For Me Secrets, on being upfront with people and not being fake, on telling the whole truth to the world and myself.
I won't give away all my secrets, because some are Good, or are secret for a reason, or aren't mine to give away. I won't stop being fake by brandishing when I'm unhappy or disapproving or downright cranky, but by highlighting the honest good moods and feelings instead of squashing them when I think it'd be more "popular" to do so.
I want to do what the horoscope suggests: get out from under the weight of my past and shed the inertia of my memories. I have spent most of my life hunched over under the burden of the guilt and shame I've either put on myself, or let others put on me. Neither is right. Neither has ever been okay, but I refuse to let it be okay anymore.
I want to say "I renounce it all from this moment!" but it's so much harder than that. Just thinking about it brings tears to my eyes. I know that many of you reading this can understand this feeling, understand the desire, the fear, and the difficulty of which I speak.
I want to live in the raw truth of now. The raw truth of now can be beautiful and ugly, can be easy and hard, can be exactly what I want and exactly what I fear. But it is not what the terrified 12-year-old that still hides in my brain thinks it is, nor is it what the anxious 18-year-old thinks it is, or even the mired 24-year-old. It is not what I've been taught by years of conditioning done by others and myself. It is not what has happened before, good or bad.
The raw truth of now is only what is in front of me. I can draw on experience, on what wisdom I've gained in my 25 years, on lessons I've been taught and told by the people in my life. But I need to learn that drawing on those things is not the same as looking into a crystal ball and knowing what will happen.
I can never know what will happen. That's terrifying and exhilarating.
Honesty, and the raw truth of now. That is what I want to grow in myself in the year 2011. I know I can do it.
The one thing that kept popping up, however, was Honesty.
I want to be a more honest person. I'm not exactly a dishonest person now, I don't lie or cheat or steal. I do, however, partake in some gossip (something I'm not proud of), and I keep things to myself that hide the whole picture of how I feel about a person or a situation, the whole picture of who I am. I've been thinking on how I'd like to change these, and other, things.
Then, as always, Free Will Astrology decided to play with my head.
Can you finally escape the pain you got imprinted with during adolescence? Is it a realistic possibility that you could triumph over the conditioning you absorbed before you knew how to talk? Do you have the power to do what few of us have done, which is to get out from under the weight of the past, shed the inertia of your memories, and live brave and free in the raw truth of NOW? If there will ever in your life be a time when you can accomplish at least some of this noble quest, Gemini, it will be in 2011.
The raw truth of Now. That is exactly what I want, and what I need.
I'm going to spend the next month concentrating on purging myself of the Bad and Not Good For Me Secrets, on being upfront with people and not being fake, on telling the whole truth to the world and myself.
I won't give away all my secrets, because some are Good, or are secret for a reason, or aren't mine to give away. I won't stop being fake by brandishing when I'm unhappy or disapproving or downright cranky, but by highlighting the honest good moods and feelings instead of squashing them when I think it'd be more "popular" to do so.
I want to do what the horoscope suggests: get out from under the weight of my past and shed the inertia of my memories. I have spent most of my life hunched over under the burden of the guilt and shame I've either put on myself, or let others put on me. Neither is right. Neither has ever been okay, but I refuse to let it be okay anymore.
I want to say "I renounce it all from this moment!" but it's so much harder than that. Just thinking about it brings tears to my eyes. I know that many of you reading this can understand this feeling, understand the desire, the fear, and the difficulty of which I speak.
I want to live in the raw truth of now. The raw truth of now can be beautiful and ugly, can be easy and hard, can be exactly what I want and exactly what I fear. But it is not what the terrified 12-year-old that still hides in my brain thinks it is, nor is it what the anxious 18-year-old thinks it is, or even the mired 24-year-old. It is not what I've been taught by years of conditioning done by others and myself. It is not what has happened before, good or bad.
The raw truth of now is only what is in front of me. I can draw on experience, on what wisdom I've gained in my 25 years, on lessons I've been taught and told by the people in my life. But I need to learn that drawing on those things is not the same as looking into a crystal ball and knowing what will happen.
I can never know what will happen. That's terrifying and exhilarating.
Honesty, and the raw truth of now. That is what I want to grow in myself in the year 2011. I know I can do it.
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