Dear People At My School,

You are not hot shit enough to text while driving. I'm sorry. You're just not. Please stop now before you run me over instead of ALMOST running me over.

Also, I don't want to hear your music. The fact that I can hear it so clearly while you're wearing headphones just makes me worry for your hearing. But I don't worry too much, because I no longer give a shit about you because GOD DAMN YOU'RE ANNOYING.

I also don't want to hear your phone conversations. No. Really. I don't. No one does. And that stupid freaking Push-To-Talk function? Is not meant for inane conversation about cats and babies. No. Really. It's not.

Lastly, to that chick from last week: The place to take a cell phone picture of a rainbow in the sky is NOT AT THE ON-RAMP TO 1-84 WHERE CARS HAVE TO MERGE TWICE WITHIN A 100 FOOT SPAN. NO. REALLY. IT'S NOT.

NO LOVE WHATSOEVER,
RuLaReJo

(Can we find an island somewhere and put all these drive-texting, music-blasting, self-important morons on it and leave them there? Please? PLEASE?)


Edit at 2:41 PM

Dear Lab Monitor in Mac Lab

It wasn't bad enough that you were 20 minutes late opening the lab for the ONE open hour it has all day (and, I think, only showing up at all because I happened to notify my mother, who happens to be the boss of the computer labs, who happened to text back minutes later with a note ending with "Grr"), but do you now have to entertain the people in here with your cell phone conversation? How are you even getting reception in here when I can't send a freaking text message?

I do not wish to be "entertained" with the antics at last night's "hot-ass party". Not even if I have the imagined hyphen wrong and it was, instead, a "hot ass-party." Not even then.

Signed
Lowly Student Who Just Wants to Work On Her Photoshop Project Before Class