BusyBusyBusy (with a dose of ARGH)

WELL.

I double-booked last-big-hang-out plans with both Aurelie and the rest of Apt 131 for tomorrow. I had forgotten that the apartment had planned a Lord of the Rings marathon (BJ has never seen, we finally own all three, we love them, etc etc) and told Aurelie we could go to Lake Michigan. Figured out my big mistake at the beginning of the week and began the mad scramble to fix it.

Tuesday, That One said that even better than trading his Thursday for my Saturday, he would just takemy Saturday, since he needed the hours. He just needed to talk to his friend who he'd made kinda-sorta-plans with, but he'd call the store that night to let me know!

...yeah, he never called back. Texting him on Wednesday got no response. Fortunately, Diana agreed to trade, so I still got Saturday off! Yay! All I had to do was work her 7:30 shift today!

...UGH.

[o] I closed last night. Left about quarter to 11 (not the best close, whole different ball of WTH).
[o] My sleep was craptastic. I don't think I got a whole hour the entire night. Just awful.
[o] Got up at 6:30, worked 7:30 to 1:30, was a moron the entire time due to sleep deprivation and unhappy stomach not allowing me much caffeine intake.
[o] Get home, get in the shower, have just enough time to get lunch at 933...and not really do anything else.
[o] On the way to Goshen to meet Aurelie, get a text from That One's girlfriend (who I'm friends with) relaying a message from him: he can totally take my Saturday shift! ...yeah, about that. Gave up on that after zero response. Go ask Diana if she wants the shift that is now hers, thanks for letting me know I worked today for nothing, JERKFACE. (I was nicer than that to his girlfriend, obviously).
[o] Hang out with Aurelie at the Goshen Starbucks, good times, good times...hey, why are these ladies setting up candles? Oh, they're hosting a Party Lites event, okay...some of their friends are here, okay...some more friends...now kids....now we're surrounded by a large crowd of loud and excited women getting way too happy about candles and completely ruining our attempts to study/write. FUN.
[o] Get home, open the door to get hit in the face with the smell of cat urine. Horace went in today to get fixed, Ryan picked him up, he pissed in the box on the way home. While he's cleaned himself off (mostly) (he's also adorably drugged), both he and the carrier still reek, making the living area completely inhospitable. So much for watching TV.

Honestly, the only person I'm annoyed with is That One, for obvious reasons. My co-workers today were nice, it was awesome to spend some more time with Aurelie, and I'm hella looking forward to tomorrow's Lord of the Rings-a-thon.

...but MAN. TODAY. BE DONE NOW.

The next week (and then some):
[o] Friday: Lord of the Rings-a-thon, hanging out/baking/drinking with Aurelie and friends in Goshen in the evening, sleeping over to make Saturday an easier start
[o] Saturday: Lake Michigan! WOO! Plus packing in the evening.
[o] Sunday: Last day at Ireland, off at 5:30, may try for another night out with co-workers, but definitely lots of packing after work.
[o] Monday: All-day-come-over-any-time-mostly-933-people party as we continue packing & cleaning.
[o] Tuesday: Scramble to finish shoving everything into the trailer and call to have it picked up that night so we don't have to wait around for it on Wednesday. Bed will be completely packed, so we're spending the night at the hotel next to 933.
[o] Wednesday: Grab breakfast at 933, say good-bye, start driving. End night in Pennsylvania.
[o] Thursday: Continue driving, arrive in Connecticut.
[o] Friday-Sunday: Say hi to everyone, visit my new store, figure out flooring and possibly new furniture, get as settled as we can without 99% of our stuff.
[o] Monday: Trailer arrives, start unpacking.

Meanwhile, my Etsy store is on vacation since (a) we're moving, (b) the listings expired yesterday, and (c) I haven't decided what to list (or re-list) and plan on polling my fanbase (ha) for ideas.

Finally, on a ridiculously sappy note, today is what only I am calling our pre-anniversary. One year from today is Ryan's and my wedding date. :)

Now, back to trying to unkink the stress from my back...

My Shingle Is Gathering Cobwebs...

I've slowed down on my photography lately, and I hate it. I got myself all excited in the first half of the year after I figured out that I wanted to be Artist and Homemaker, and I took the first steps to make that into an eventual reality. I opened a store! I put my work out there! Progress! Exciting!

...then no one bought anything.

I know that I can't expect to take off like a rocket, and just instantly start making enough to quit my day job and do what I love instead. But it still knocked me down a couple of pegs. I let myself dream too much, as I tend to do, and when it didn't come true immediately I panicked. I started thinking that if I took a million pictures, of the things that got the most responses on Facebook and Tumblr (aka pretty pretty flowers), maybe the exposure and attention would happen, and sales would follow. I even submitted my photoblog to a couple of directories and collections on Tumblr, hoping for a little bit of exposure that way.

But neither worked. I didn't get more attention, I didn't get "showcased"...if anything, response has dropped off. And I let it get to me, I let myself translate it into I'm Not Good Enough and I Should Keep Doing Flowers Eventually It HAS To Work! I've gotten ultra-critical (and I'm already my own worst critic) and afraid to try new or weird subjects.

You know what?

Fuck. That.

The 30 Day Photography Challenge has helped a bit (even when I'm behind a few days, like now), and I've been forcing myself to move from "That might be a cool picture" to "I'm going to try and capture that even though I'm in public and will get strange looks :D!" What with being a gentle weirdo and my recent penchant for dressing like a little kid, I think I can embrace the Eccentric Artist persona and be okay with the odd looks. It means I'm Doing It Right...right? ;)

Happy Birthday To Me, Happy Birthday To Me...

My day:
[o] wake up very slowly, feeling slightly...off from the birthday dinner turned bar crawl that had me home at 3 AM :D
[o] head to Starbucks with Ryan, to get hugs and birthday wishes from lovely friends :D
[o] Aurelie gave me a mirror from Ten Thousand Villages, a small chain featuring art and jewelry and wonders from all over the world. The mirror is from Bangladesh, made from recycled chip and snack bags. Even better than the mirror (which is really cool and colorful) was the card, telling me that she's glad I moved to Indiana and she met me and we can be awesomely awkward together. :D
[o] Ben stopped by to show off one of his kittens, who looked like a ball of lint with the teeniest eyes and teeniest mouth and even teenier little mew. I got to hold him, he was ADORABLE.
[o] Wanted to go to pet store, Ryan said no. I've no idea why...
[o] Got shoes for Kitty and Alex's wedding (two weeks!!)
[o] Came home, checked mail to find card and present--rainbow piano key socks!!!--from Mom. :D Forgot to call and thank her because I'm a bad kid.
[o] Puttered around online while Ryan made a cake in the kitchen.
[o] While cake cooled, went out to get photo paper and dinner. Came back home with dinner, watched Goldmember while eating (sometimes, you just need a big dose of silly), then I read a bit while Ryan decorated aforementioned cake.
[o] Was presented with cake, complete with 26 lit candles and Ryan singing Happy Birthday. He had even spent a good amount of time trying to tint the cake frosting just the right shade of purple. <3
[o] Ate cake, then went to our computers, where I finally what I've been plotting and working on for three months, speeding up this past week...

I present to you...Ruthenium Photography, on Etsy!

:D

I feel extremely nervous and a little anxious and I can't shake that old feeling from school where I'm SURE that everyone can see all the mistakes I'm making even if I fix them...but THERE! I'm out there! I'm doing it! SCARED BUT DOING IT ANYWAY! WOO!

I also have a Facebook Page and Twitter for it, for the purposes of spreading the word (and business!) as much as possible. Whee!

Tomorrow is back to work, but I'm NOT going to think about that right now. Right now, I'm going to get all comfy and watch some Bones with Ryan and then read some Game of Thrones and then go to bed.

It was a good birthday. I think I'll do it again next year! :)

Closer...Closer!...

I'm a step closer! :D

Tomorrow, I get to work on other steps:

[o] Talking to people at FedExKinkos and getting solid costs for printing & shipping, which I'll then use to set prices
[o] Looking into getting a Post Office box for shop-related mail (returns, checks, etc) (may seem paranoid, but I'm taking into consideration the three adults also living at this address)
[o] Fine-tuning shop policies (returns, exchanges, etc funstuff)

I'm trying to select an Official Opening Date. I think I've mentioned in the past that I'm weird about picking dates. I like them to be auspicious, but I don't want to be silly, blah blah blah. I'll figure it out, but until then I'll take suggestions. Right now I'm considering either May 1st, or my birthday (May 21st). *shrug*

For now, dinner is almost ready, and I am very very hungry. And tired. And sore. And yeah. *thud*